15hrs per week on team 15 on area of expertise 15 on unpredictable
It is not emotional babysitting, it’s your job. Emotional labor is the key to being a good boss.
Richard Tedlow biography of Andy Grove (intel’s CEO) #[[Book List]]
Bosses guide a team to achieve results
No absolute rules to establishing relationships, but two dimensions listed will help
^^1. Care Personally^^
^^2. Challenge Directly^^
Keeping it professional denies that everyone is human being with human feelings. Repressing who we are alienates you.
Fred Kofman (google) ‘bring your whole self to work’.
[[Colin Powell]] (former US sec of state) being responsible sometimes means pissing people off. Book: [[24 lessons from Colin Powell]].
^^**Radical candor is not nit-picking.**^^
Rule of thumb for any relationship is to leave three unimportant things unsaid each day.
Story of a successful meeting, direct report pulled aside and gave honest feedback on what went well. Asked if she realized she said ‘Um’ a lot. When she clearly did not receive the feedback, told her she’s smart but saying Um makes her sound stupid.
Russian anecdote about guy who had to amputate his dogs tail but he loves him so much he cuts it off an inch a day rather than all at once.
Want to avoid tension or discomfort.
Praise can be ruinously empathetic. Investigate praise as thoroughly as criticism
Your fly is down - I appreciate it when people point it out to me when I do the same thing. I hope you don’t mind me mentioning it.